Movie Review: Captain America, The First Avenger

Captain America, The First Avenger

PG-13, 2 hr. 1 min.

Directed By

Joe Johnston

Written By

Christopher Markus, Stephen McFeely

Genres

Mystery & Suspense, Action & Adventure

Main Actors: Chris Evans, Tommy Lee Jones, Hayley Atwell, Hugo Weaving

Easy on the eyes factor: 7. Chris Evans is a handsome actor and well fit and chiseled for the part. Hayley Atwell is very beautiful and lovable.

30 Minute Rule: No. For me, it took way to long to get to the action and purpose of the film.

Plot: Captain America: The First Avenger will focus on the early days of the Marvel Universe when Steve Rogers (Chris Evans) volunteers to participate in an experimental program that turns him into the Super Soldier known as Captain America. As Captain America, Rogers joins forces with Bucky Barnes (Sebastian Stan) and Peggy Carter (Hayley Atwell) to wage war on the evil HYDRA organization, led by the villainous Red Skull (Hugo Weaving.)

My Review: Let me be point out a fact about my movie taste so that you will understand that I'm writing this review objectively. I'm not big on superhero movies. I collected Marvel comics when i was a young teen. My favorites were Spider-Man and The Incredible Hulk. After watching a few of the Superman movies in the 80s, I didn't feel that comic books translated to the silver screen very well. I didn't get the same enjoyment as I did from comic books. Until, 1989's Batman. The one with Michael Keaton, Jack Nicholson, and the beautiful Kim Basinger. That movie changed everything and it became the measuring stick for all superhero movies to follow. Then 2002 Spider-Man hit the screen and it was even better. Then came Christoper Nolan's Batman Begins and The Dark Knight. They just keep getting better and better. Then, on the other end of the spectrum, there's The Incredible Hulk movies, The X-Men series of films, The Fantastic Four, The Green Lantern, The Green Hornet, and a host of other garbage superhero movies that just don't measure up. They have too much CGI, poor acting, hokey characters and lines, making attempts to be light enough for the 8 year old, but dark enough for the 35 year old. It just doesn't work. And I usually don't like them. So remember this whenever you read one of my reviews on a superhero movie. I'm coming from a very angry place. I want to like them. I feel that I'm supposed to like them. I just don't. Except for Christopher Nolan's Batman Trilogy, Sam Raimi's Spider-Man, and I'm hoping with all my heart that I will like the new Amazing Spider Man.

Ok, so here's Captain America, It did very well at the box office. People told me how great it was. One of my friends even was so inclined to see it twice. I said, hmm. I have to see it. he said, "i'll go with you!" for a third viewing. I had not been this excited about a movie since Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Really. Seriously. I loved that movie. Long story short, I did not go to the theater to see it, but instead waited for video. And am I glad that I did. For me, it sucked. I never liked Captain America in the comics. I'm not sure why I thought that I would like him in live action! He has no fun toys like Batman. Can't fly like Superman. Can't climb walls or swing on webs like Spider-Man, No cool mode of transportation like the Batmobile or a Silver Surfer. Not super fast like Flash. What does he do? What does he have? A shield ladies and gentlemen. Yes. A red, white and blue shield. And he's quick. Not fast, quick. And he's strong. Not Superman strong, more like Lenny in Of Mice and Men strong. And he can fight. Big whup. At least Iron Man had a flying suit! Get a flying suit Steve Rogers! He's mighty high on the suck-o-meter. It's pretty amazing, and not Spider-Man like amazing, but more like Smurf-like amazing, that he even survives the movie. I'm sorry. It wasn't worth the $1 at Redbox or the $3.99 on Apple TV. Very disappointed.

Rating: 3 of 10 ♥♥♥